Just How Much Has Been an
Illusion
I am looking for my
heart, Have you seen it? I gave it away
for someone to hold, cherish and love forever.
The distance it
traveled I know not to where, I have not felt its closeness in so long, the
closeness of two hearts beating as one.
After I give it away, I
learned the one that I love from the depth of my soul, loved another.
I cried and cried, felt
so hurt and alone as if my heart was not good enough to love, cherish and hold.
He just up and
disappeared, shutting me out as if I no longer mattered, not even as a friend.
I really trusted him as
I thought I could no other, he knew I loved him from the start. Never thinking
he would break my heart.
I thought he really
loved me too, but was it an illusion, that leads me to believe he loved me too?
This is how I lost
track of my heart, all in this illusion of falling apart, I know it is out
there in limbo land, not being loved, cared for or cherished anymore, not to
even be a close friend. Why? Leaving me alone and totally lost never to find my
heart again, I gave it away and can’t get it back.
I have to rethink and
restart my life over again without the one I love, all because I never really
had a chance.
Was I just under an
illusion of thinking someone really truly loved me, or blinded by high hopes
and dreams of unreality?
Someday I pray that the
illusion will turn into reality, and someone will love me for me.
Someone who wants to be
with me and not shut me out because I cry to think the one I love loves someone
else.
And hopefully once
again not get it thrown back in my face as if to say, your heart is not good enough.
